Week 50, Entry 1
May. 1st, 2023 12:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
goatgodschildIt is May Day, the first of May. Today is grey and cold and damp and dark, just the sort of day to be sad on, rather than one to celebrate on.
In two weeks, it will be one year since I hurt Malcolm, and drove him away.
Today, I had to refuse the paid internship that I had previously agreed to. I was not previously forthcoming to my case manager, and not to the Library Director who would have been my employer. They are both very unhappy with me, naturally, and rightly so. I have been feeling quite sad about this all day.
Yet at the same time, I quite clearly could not -- I would be doing six hours of work, three days a week, with a 30-minute break in the middle. Which would be manageable, maybe, but the two-hour commute in addition to that, meaning I would be getting up at about 6:30am and wouldn't be back home till 7pm? That's pushing it too far.
In two weeks, it will be one year since I hurt Malcolm, and drove him away.
Today, I had to refuse the paid internship that I had previously agreed to. I was not previously forthcoming to my case manager, and not to the Library Director who would have been my employer. They are both very unhappy with me, naturally, and rightly so. I have been feeling quite sad about this all day.
Yet at the same time, I quite clearly could not -- I would be doing six hours of work, three days a week, with a 30-minute break in the middle. Which would be manageable, maybe, but the two-hour commute in addition to that, meaning I would be getting up at about 6:30am and wouldn't be back home till 7pm? That's pushing it too far.
no subject
Date: 2023-05-02 01:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-05-02 01:09 am (UTC)